We had sex on my friends waterbed ..after that the whole school kept asking him if he had fun getting "sea-sick" last night.
You deserve yourself a blunt and a build a bear.
The tent wall coming unstaked in the wind and hitting me in the face really sobered me up
She was either really drunk or really not interested. Everytime I tried to ask her about herself she would respond with a line from Stepbrothers.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
In case you come back to the room and i'm not here, yes there's a cup filled with gravy in the microwave. Just take it out if you need to heat something.
Let's not refer to him as Dustin. That makes him seek like a real person, not just a dick I would like to experience.
Yea there's blood all over the porch but we wont have to buy alcohol for the rest of the week
My internship group is made up of all freshman. Their enthusiasm for education and social interaction sickens me.
Please tell me that chemistry equipment is for chemistry and not for producing felonies.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It gave me the St Patrick's Day nickname Slutty McShitfaced. I've never felt so understood.
i will not be out-irished. not this night. if i don't wake up tomorrow handcuffed to a hospital bed, i have failed my ancestors.
My vagina is officially offended.
I was just drinking but now I'm drinking and chasing with red bull. I call this "getting ready for work"
There is a woman in the stall next to me giving a pep talk to her daughter that wants to call off her wedding. I'm afraid to pee!
QUICK FAX ME THE BALL
Not how faxing works at all btw
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