I have a drunk 6th sense to lyrics of songs i dont know. It only works when i dance..
Your dick is once again the conversation topic.
Also, just saw a homeless man answer a phone call on a blackberry...
it's circumsized.
I think this conversation is over.
I was surprised he admitted he couldnt keep up. We both knew but usually they dont come out and say it
Two girls I have never met just thumb wrestled to decide who gets to make out with me.
Before I dignify that with an answer, let me get this straight. You're asking me if I wiped my ass on the towels?
Don't freak out about the couches in the driveway. We tried to unpack the uhaul drunk.
The idea of snorting emergen-c actually just crossed my mind.
Told him I'd blow him in the bathroom. There was a giant window everyone was looking thru. He whipped it out n I burst out laughing n walked away. Even blackout drunk I set the bar high. You should be proud.
I am texting my fuck buddy about fucking tonight, while facebook chatting with his wife about food.
whoevers yellow car is in your driveway right now... i plan to steal. just an FYI
We just had a contest for who has less of a gag reflex...I am sad to admit that my mother won.
He tried to throw up into a beer bottle. It was a complete disaster. Vomit went everywhere. It put the Bellagio's fountain to shame.
He lasted less than 30 sec. in bed and then sent me a friend request on LinkedIn. Wtf.
Randomize
