dude, best porn name ever, "the Hunt for Red Cocktober"
yea i came on her face and told her to bring a snorkel next time
Its a sad day when your bush has a better set of hair than you do
I forgot how few teeth there are in this state...
you spent the night getting lap dances from a stripper with a c-section scar then ended up at a one room casino by the airport and you say you're too good to blaze and see pirahna 3d? bullshit
According to FB I fucked in a field 365 days ago.
No, its ok. Im playing strip pretty pretty princess im currently dueling for the crown
His roommates came in and started a dance party in his room while we were having sex. He said it wasnt the first time.
Well two things you gotta know if you're gonna live here. your alcohol tolerance is gonna need to go up, and people do blow. Get used to it. Nobody is gonna pressure you into it. That shits expensive
I found out Naomi Campbell and I have the same birthday and I feel like that explains so much
They put me in room 420 every time and I take bubble baths and smoke in the room and they bring food TO MY BED
I've spent hours masturbating before. It's actually my favorite Sunday activity
I'm just gonna back away slowly and come back when there's less weird crap.
Sometimes I get confused on who I really actually know and who's lives I just know everything about via internet. Its a fine line
He just took off his shirt. I'll text you later.
Randomize
