nah, shes just mad because we went through all her fb pics and tagged her crotch as all the guys shes fucked
Can we have fireworks this year or will the ocean explode?
Wow... that's disturbing man, and their not even my balls
Pretty sure I just had sex with the black kid who grew up in a car from "angels in the outfield"
How come I never meet celebrities?
I spiked my fruit smoothie. Taking bikini season diet to a whole new level
Apple should advertise that their phones are puke-proof. They would appeal to a whole new audience.
My addiction to golf is getting out of hand....I just caught myself swinging my dick like a putter while peeing.
Almost to my house to grab beer. And pants.
I wore sunglasses to take a shower. I might be hungover.
You can't honestly expect me to maintain an erection when you have the Glen Beck show on
Hey do you remember me?
You were a giant banana.... how could I forget.
He's literally cuddling with the washer and dryer.
Alcohol. Making me feel good about myself since 2008
This whole thing is fucking bullshit. I should be wasting all my hard-earned money at Planet Con this weekend but NOOOOOOOOO. Now I'll never get Roy Thomas to sign my comic
Whats a little breast milk between friends?
Randomize
