ENDLESS SCROLLING ON TUMBLR WAS MADE FOR HIGH PEOPLE!
i just saw the eighteen different ways i could die and only after that did i realize i'd made a poor decision
i'm pretty sure i saw my life flash before my eyes when we ran a red light. i continued to drink and be the drunk backseat driver.
If I don't have herpes this will be the single greatest day of my life
Looking for the remote in the couch. Finding Adderall beads. Considering utilizing.
I don't think I'd trust a marching band with trampolines to not cause serious damage to themselves/ property.
I need to shower, but I have no shower curtain... I think I can get by with a whore bath and a hat for one more day.
That is was cool to fuck the single mother accross the street until every girl i bring home gets the car keyed.
just saw a kid get pissed on buy a tiger at the zoo. His dad is rofling and the kid is crying. I think I have to go make a new friend
I puked into my skirt and then had to carry it to the bathroom and dump it out, Lmfao and it was like 2pm
You poured 151 in your eye, ran face first into a tree, fell down, then threw a lawn chair at the dog...all before passing out in the hallway and pissing yourself. There is no way to redeem yourself.
i just cleaned my bong... I do not feel healthy
Just saw a commercial for non alcoholic baileys cream. WHAT THE HELL IS THE POINT?!
I just learned that the grill marks on a Burger King burger patty are actually previously burnt on there with a radioactive spray-on liquid and McDonald's french fries are actually 5% potato.
She dropped the call after she told me she doesn't want to hear about how loud he can scream.
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