Well i threw up in my mouth a few times. But i successfully swallowed it. Still going strong.
He told me I remind him of his sister...
Was this before or after you did it?
before... I mean, it's been a long time. I just tried not to think of it during.
I overheard a kid saying to his mom at Walmart: "Mommy.. should we buy cups for daddy's spit?"
For some reason, Oliver from Hannah Montana reminds me of pudding.
That's cute.
I think the recipie for awesome sauce is butter and semen
I keep trying to sit and the chair keeps running away from me
Still burping lighter fluid. Totally awful.
She has puke on the back of her shirt not quite sure how the hell she did that
I miss my brother. He would have fucked the fat girl for me.
I told you I would
I wouldnt do that to you. You're my actual friend
After he came, I wiped my mouth on my baby blanket. I could feel nana rolling over in her grave.
I realize designer coke was a douchey thing to say but the point of the story is I did bath salts
Idk how much vodka is on these pants but I'm gonna wear them anyway: the biopic
I had sex upstairs in my parents house, and my mom texted me and said "those raccoons are out of control in the walls."
my goal is to never have a bac of 0.0 the whole time while in the state of florida, which means i have to chug a beer before i cross the state line
I’m traumatised. Bring vodka and condoms.
Randomize
