Just wanted to let you know that if you need my services as a male dancer for his birthday, let me kno so I can clear my schedule
Next time, if you wake and bake, make sure you nail the wake part. Not easy to explain to mum. Or the fire brigade.
just watched her puke in her purse and put it back on the bar. then half hour later put her hand in her bag to get a pen to give me her number. I bet she is game for anything
yeah my parents were only ten feet away and we somehow managed to do it in five different positions without them noticing
Yes, she gives me platonic blowjobs as part of our friendship.
How can I not totally like a guy that told me my boobs were too big for me to be taught how to play golf?
He may only be 25% black, but after that sexual experience I am 100% never going back.
Just woke up from a weed coma and found a stem in my bra. Rainy day success.
You can't be friends with my side piece. Conflict of interest.
if i bang your brother are we still cool?
i need to start buying Plan B in bulk and leaving them at the door. I'm really sick of walking to CVS with my one-nighters
Do you have a moment to talk about our lord and savior, Kendra's boobs?
I did way too many drugs this past week for having a broken nose #commitment
Roomies told me I showed up to my house alone with no pants on and burrs in my hair... I live in the middle of the city
Don't take a pillow from my bed. You don't know which ones of them my vagina has been on
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