I bet Jafar would keep his hat on during
fighting downstairs. join me tonight to hear their makeup sex. also, let's make skittles vodka.
He's throwing up in my bed and I'm not even getting fucked for this
The straight man in me wants to hit on her. But the gay man in me wants to compliment her on her awesome outfit.
You are so lucky you didn't go back to Tate's house. They decided to figure out who had the biggest balls... I was the judge
There's a bus with a band full of dancing women in bras. I think I like it here.
Crappy Mother's Day to you! Those of us who don't have children fill the void with hot sex, sleeping in, more sex, leisurely suntanning, foreign travel, overseas sex, paying cash for sports cars, watching TV, having sex on the floor in front of TV porn, lounging around the house, or whatever the hell we want.
this hangover isn't hhappening. im not letting it
its winning. its definitely happening
Cause I'll toss Tabasco sauce in his eyes and yell "Cobra attack" and walk away
She dumped me and then asked if I wanted to come to her improv show. Fuck theatre majors, man.
Based on his face I'm positive he has a beautiful penis.
The Olympian is in my bed
Thanks for DJing my sex last night. You were on point 💜
OMFG I JUST SEARCHED DILDO ON THE WORK SHARED AMAZON ACCOUNT!!!!!
Nothing like having a family watch you dry heave at the end of the dock
Randomize
