are you serious?? is your clit as sensitive as your emotions
i wish
Best porno line to date...."drinks are on me..." while she female ejaculates into a wine chalice
God Help those hot young girls. It's going to be like Bambi in iraq. Except worse.
I swear that when I have my own bathroom, I'm gonna lock myself in there and masterbate for at least 3 days in sheer appreciation of it.
If you come, call before you come in. I'm tanning my balls. Enjoy that visual.
captain&coke to the library. STAT. this is an emergency. this is not a drill. I repeat: THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
Remember that pineapple I soaked in vodka last month? Just found it- nothing is growing on it? Think it's safe?
just peed in rthe mens room but seranaeded them with adelle the whole timee so they didnt mind
Omg, those nutella cakes are heavenly, like licking the nipples of a muscular black Jesus.
So your brother is gay after all... Just caught him making out with my brother... Apparently he's gay too
I don't want anything calamari shaped after last night. But I appreciate the Cheerios offer.
You have not lived until you've slid down a waterfall fucked out of your mind. Fact.
He and I didn't so much date, as watch cartoons and go down on each other.
RICK BROUGHT THE HOT BARTENDER HOME. SOMEONE CALL THE FIRE DEPARTMENT, CUZ RICKYS ON FIIIIIIIRE.
lmao nvm she punched him in the face and left
Only thing I have going for me is jacking off, weed, and saturdays
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