Then all the boys were saying that they were amazed at how much i could smoke...i'm so proud of myself
i feel like im playing gay clue. i have to figure out where i am, who took me home, and what he put in me
We have sex, then he cooks. It's like a fantasy.
If youre the one that ate my brownies this morning I only have two things to say to you
Those had pot in them
And good luck on your interview asshole
Yes I want to fuck your friends but it's out of respect and love for you.
I'm stranded in the Hampton area. Looks like I'm going to have to take one for the team and pass out by this applebees.
Was it fun? The night started with home made Jager and ended in him falling out of a tree with a pocket full of house numbers...you tell me.
Right now I'm standing in front of my fridge, drinking wine out of the bottle and eating cold steak with my hands. I am THE BEST at being single.
You should help rebuild my confidence with your dick. Altruism: Pass it on.
The awkward moment when a lady ask you what kind of lipliner you're using, but really I have just finished eating hot cheetos.
PSA- Wearing assless chaps results in embarrassingly painful sunburn
I went to watch porn and there's already 3 Santa videos. Happy November 1st.
Holy fuck, my entire boob is bruised! Lierally my boob is just one big bruise.
i sent him a picture of his friend's dick and told him he should really stop thinking he's my only option.
yea i'll help you find a man. but, when I say jump, you say on who.
Randomize
