He came through my line today and bought designer impostor perfume, just for men gel, and astroglide. I almost DIED.
HAH. HARRY POTTER CASUAL CONVO HAS BEEN EXTENDED TO DISCUSSING WEATHER. SO PRO
Nothing says true friendship like 2 people bonding over potentially having AIDS.
Jessi just used the excuse "it's not you it's me" to get out of getting a lap dance.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I need you to come over. Im crying, day drinking and working out simultaneously.
Just a heads up, the coffee pot is filled with Jager.
If you try to operate on me with a Bic pen and vodka, I'm never talking to you again
Just threw up. It looks like I may have swallowed a cigarette.
the evidence from last night is not good...
what evidence?
my underwear is on inside out, and there are french fries in my hair...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
SEX BINGO!
Canadian or clown?
I never thought people would keep their guns next to their fake plastic penises, but there they were.
Baked goods and tits. Hard to go wrong there.
one of my coworkers asked me if I was PMSing today...... excuse me sir, but it is none of your business as to what my uterus is or is not doing right now. fucker.
and yea, I'm PMSing.
It's a draw. You need to settle it in Smash, Soul Calibur, and/or rock-paper-scissors, the last of which Steve claims is bullshit.
fell asleep while jerking off ln. woke up to my hand in my pants and my cat crawling all over me
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