Just got done shaving my balls. You were right.
Just took my first sake bomb. I love japan
If I had a clone, I'd fuck it with a condom
I think my penis ruined a perfectly good friendship.
she gave me one of those friendship bracelets and said as long as I wore it it was like an all-access pass to her vagina
Ate apple sauce off his penis. Nutritious and slutty.
i lost his rear view mirror, your phone charger, and my lesbian virginity. 21 isn't shaping up too well so far.
I just hit the bong during the whole bday song then blew the candles out with my exhale.
Please take a moment of silence for the fact that I still have all 10 fingers
Chilling. The soap was talking at one point if I rememeber right...
You were outside cuddling a rock singing Bohemian Rhapsody.
I said "I am wrapped in the Cocoon Of Comfort! You should go." He started to argue and I yelled "COCOON OF COMFORT!!!" silencing him
We've been walking through the woods for two hours, he just keeps taking pictures. At least we'll remember this tomorrow.
I feel like the first time i have to use my accident insurance its going to be in some sex mishap with you.
Some guy just walked past the bus stop in a lab coat and with a samurai sword and case...
Randomize
