Until that no good dick sucking whore stays away from my boyfriend I am gonna start blowing all of his friends...
Who has a tranny cab driver? I have a tranny cab driver.
I'm returning our mountain of beer cans, while wearing a Budweiser sweatshirt. i don't look like an alcoholic.
"reccomended dose" hasn't been in my vocabulary for quite some time.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It just feels wrong masturbating with my neighbor's cat in my apartment
Just passed a guy passed out on a riding lawn mower in his front yard.
Well regardless of where or with who you will be blacking out and i will be pouring shots down ur throat like a baby bird
I am the sex elephant in the room. Again.
Didn't know hookah bars could end badly. I feel for her hair
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You fucked two dudes in the same night and still went home to your cats. How does that happen?
I miss forts and drugs that made me believe in unicorns...
This hangover is what we deserve after that level of debauchery.
Just used the pen i got in my signing ceremony to pack down my bowl. coach would be proud
I think I won an award for shitting and vomiting at the same time.
He showed up at my house drunk with a pizza and said he wanted to lazily finger me while I watched supernatural. Who was I to say no?
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