Is there a tactful way for me to ask a girl to let me know when she gets her period?
I wanna eat
then frost
then eat your cupcake
You just kept rubbing her head and repeating "I really like your head, I want your head..." over and over for like 10 minutes straight... And she didnt even stop you.
trust me, there is no more disappointing feeling in the world than waking up at 4 in the morning with a random half naked chick in your bed and then realizing your roommates girlfriend just wandered into the wrong room.
he let me duct tape his mouth because i said it was my fetish, i really just wanted him to shut up
Thank you blackberry messenger, for giving me a way to sext faster and more efficiently
I woke up and someone had put toast at my feet. I was SO. HAPPY.
I walked in on her just letting her nose bleed into her friend's hands
I just peed in a flower pot on the veranda while crying and holding a drink
she said she walked into the kitchen and i was sitting ass naked on the floor chugging her parents vodka.
I have learned that if you don't want to hook up with the guy who walked you home, food is great compensation.
Just visited the liquor store.... for the 4th time today. shits gonna get weird
When she says 'Polish hangover cure' she just means more vodka. Don't do it.
is it bad that I see hot guys I wanna sleep with as challenges instead of actual people?
yes. but it works for you
And here I am, playing fetch with my cat at two in the morning.
Randomize
