summer is not the time to consider going full bush.
Walking home still drunk in snow. Snowflakes are my only hydration..Need moreee
Going to eat lunch. Bunch of people in church clothes, and we are hungover, wearing pajamas, and in real danger of puking on the floor. We're about to destroy the ambience of this joint.
considering i was high when my dad made me pee in the cup i might fail this one
the vast amounts of cleavage i'm sporting to my final says "no, I didn't study but don't worry I've got something lined up for when I don't graduate".
Since your rent is paid til the first, we decided to use your apartment as the beer pong room. We apologize in advance for losing your security deposit.
Its Nebraska, I'm sure im not the first person to wake up hungover in a corn field.
Lets ignore the fact that you want to turn your dorm room into a sex dungeon and focus on the real issues here.
We did Irish Car Bombs out of butter trays, the influence of the retired community is astounding- I didn't know people even owned more than one butter tray.
well he never texted me back and the pizza I took my rage out didn't deserve such malice
Believe me honey Imma fuck the discount out of at least one plastic surgeon in my life
We should have a mid-burrito sex-break, too. Just so we don't get too full all at once
Good point.
And Mike keeps telling Will that love at first sight is true and this is just a shit show. Help.
She made me baby bird juul smoke to her while we were fucking
His sisters are going to have a heyday finding all those condoms in their bunk beds.
Randomize
