do you remember how we all fit in that bathtub?
tequila
Wow, you were right... Weed does start conversations
My New Years Resolution was to get a girl I dont know pregnant. 8 months later I can check that off the list..
he sounded really stupid. it was like his puke had a stutter, too.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
And im sorry for wishing your girlfriend gets genital warts.
i feel like im paying for every hangover i didnt experience last year as a freshman. thank you sophomore year.
I asked you if you needed a ride and you kept saying "no, my name is katelyn"
i should probably stop thinking with my vagina, and start using that $70, 000 education i can't afford. what the fuck.
A beef tasting is not what I needed while hungover
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You are going to come home to a suitcase in the fridge. Just go with it.
I guess I'm open to more types of dick now
I swear man, you fly across the country to give a boy your virginity and he suddenly thinks you like him
The last time I've felt a woman's touch, the twin towers were compromised. You can wait like one week
I yelled at the cab driver to slow down because my unborn children live here, and pointed to my uterus. I think my message was lost in translation though because he immediately offered me his card...
I think drunk me saved him in my phone as "beautiful man" to play a joke on sober me
Randomize