...she just doesn't genetically have the things I want my kids to have.
like why cant he just admit that he still wants to fuck me even though im underage
his dad told me thanks for making his little boy a man at breakfast this morning
hapi new year, hope this year brings u happiness and lots of sexi people ;)
stop writing like that.
Ate lunch. Still drunk. Keep forgetting I'm in Texas but then I look around at the people and remember.
maddie and i have invented a community puke bowl. explanation later
the crazy preacher outside Willard just began a monologue that began with "when i look at a vagina." We should stop by there more often
I'm the only adult here not drinking and their 2 year old daughter is trying to play dolls with me.. I've never been so demoralized in my life.
Woke up on the kitchen floor cuddling with the dummy we made of you. Hope your internship is going well.
Just drank an entire bottle of champagne for lunch. It's gonna be that kind of semester.
Yeah dude. Pulled out the couch and a bird flew at me. Please tell me who put a bird in my house.
When you finally get laid, I shall make you a trophy out of dildos
Body paints and jello. Your canvas awaits
Another sexterpiece awaits
Hey nothing wrong with those! I can't believe the guys who let me see where they live on first dates. Even more surprising, I don't stalk them after they've done me wrong.
You dove at him but passed out mid dive. Shame it wasnt a costume party your superman suit wouldve been clutch in the situation
Randomize
