Before we started fucking, he laid me on the bed, and asked my what my sleep number was, so that i would be "comfy"
The only comparison I have for the iPhone is that it's like youre constantly getting a blow job
Found her in the closet eating mayo out of the jar with a knife
Well then. It seems like we have a Mexican standoff of genitals
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I've never danced to a Michael Jackson song in a bar and left alone bro. Something in girls loves a guy who dances to mj
and I think you ate the old crusty spaghetti on the counter when we came home last night judging by the carnage
If I hid at school to avoid the cops, is it fleeing and evading or just being a good student?
I just had a very enlightening conversation with my hat. we need more of whatever the fuck that was.
That awkward moment when your boyfriend tries to have sex with his go pro on #hdporn
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
my grandpa paid for my boob job but he just doesn't know it.
I'm naked on my couch and just ate a chip that was in my belly button.. my 20s have been weird.
I'm trying to blow this guy down here can you please get my husband out of the house.
after that bj i gave him, i could fucking punch his mom and he wouldn't give a shit
he broke off the kiss to ask "can I grab your boob?" like props for asking for clear and concise consent but there HAS to be a sexier way to do it
She just texted me saying "come over and eat me out, my vagina smells like honey glazed ham." I know I shouldn't be, but i'm just so curious.
Randomize