the ***** family is living proof that there are no more lifeguards in the humen gene pool
She took her shirt off and was broader than Dwight Howard.
you think the cum will come out of moms black shirt?
my professor just said "the power of the situation"
drink
She came home wasted 'not wantin to talk about it' so for revenge I woke her up with a dutch oven and she puked all over me and the bed. I can't win.
Dude I told you 22 year olds shouldn't get married
Church boner. Awkwardddd
Yeah like at least with a penis what you see is what you get with a vagina there can always be a surprise inside
apparently i was just sitting there with my shirt down holding my boobs saying "its ok. its all gonna be ok"
i have a wrist watched drawn on my wrist that it says shot o clock
Even though ive seen her get fisted by another girl at a party, shes still a doctor.
As i lay in bed, clutching my face, i'm starting to believe your dick in my eye story.
Just be aware that next year I will probably try to seduce you to avoid going to the gym
When you sober up and come in here, I'm in your bed because you pissed on me in mine. So fuck. Off.
I woke up and found a stick of butter in my pocket. There's no butter in the house so I don't know who's it is. Using it to make cookies.
You can not love someone based on who they were when they were 9. Does he know how many dicks I've sucked since then?
Randomize
