Did you see Brett Michaels get knocked on his ass?
Hurt me personally.
Knocked his cowboy hat off... Bandanna was still good though
Wow i just got reported to security for being a homeless person trying to break into the library.
we went to the store to buy cookie dough and conditionally went straight towards the booze
just to let you know coffee and vodka was a bad way to start the day
I got spanked with a cardboard tube. Apparently he used to be a percussionist. Who favored marching band tunes. It was weird.
He woke up, mumbled "silverware", and went back to sleep
thats the sluttiest christmas spirit ever.
i actually pissed myself from laughing when I saw the old man in lingerie carrying a spiderman purse. I dont know if he was real or if it was the tequila, but my head hurts.
Can you send me a picture of you not naked, my mom wants to see what you look like
A houseboat for a bachelor party is a terrible idea, we nearly die when on dry land, so how the hell are we supposed to survive a 3 day binge on a massive lake?
Had a dream I beat up niall then madeout with him while snorting coke out of a dragons egg
We got drunk and crashed a fifty year old woman's birthday party for the food. Whoops.
I need to be her Aladdin, and show her the world. The sex world.
He was talking about his friends deceased ferret and I still managed to orgasm.
Now THAT is dedication!
YOU'D BE LIKE A MERMAID! I'll bring you coffee filters to cover your tits.
Randomize
