hook me up with the drugs dog keep up the good work
i don't care who i fucked last night, until im at 43plus im not considering myself slutty
I sware she could use her own nose as a dildo.
you are the weird ass hat to my lady gaga
Since my computer broke, i've been masterbating to girls gone wild. I feel like i'm in the 90's.
while 90% of the female population goes to worship a fictional character tonight at midnight, I will be taking advantage of having the bars ALL TO MYSELF.
Yeah, you spent an hour in front of the mirror trying to reenact the Sailor Moon theme song.
you were sitting on my toliet with a double cheesburger in your hand asking me how the cheeseburger even got there.
I just found him singing into an empty paper towel roll while microwaving an empty ice cream carton. I'm gonna run away now.
I feel like I'm in an ocean of eels jacking me off
Smoked Hookah in the playhouse last night. Childhood was so fun.
I look like I just got gang banged and I'm wearing a Taylor swift t shirt. It's not gonna be a pretty breakfast.
Today is a spill-drugs-all-over-myself kind of day.
Nothing warms my heart more than the sight of a naked hockey player in my bed.
We stood outside the room listening to them have sex and making meow noises
That's not right, is it?
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