I just walked into a tree. I think it's time to go home.
I need a booty call who doesn't know my boyfriend or my friends.
I think I can smell my own vagina right now
Attention: due to the power outage we will not be playing drinking games and watching the royal wedding. Bring your own bottle and we'll just drink in silence.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Like some sort of pot growing robin hood.
Well, I found my bra. It's in my glove compartment with a half-eaten Snickers bar and a Jesus bookmark.
Would you wanna look up as you cum and for a split-second see your dad?
Just made a drunk dude do 20 push-ups. In the parking lot of the bar tonight for a keystone light I found in the back of my truck.
Oh yum
I walked in her room to find her rubbing lotion on her face high as fuck.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Either you got hacked or we need to have a serious discussion about sending penis enlargement emails to your straight friends and why you shouldn't. It sends the wrong message.
BUT YOU MUST FINISH YOUR QUEST
TO FIND THE HOLY GRAIL
AND GET DRUNK OFF YOUR ASS BY DRINKING OUT OF IT
Well we went from the roof to the stairwell to an air mattres. One day were going to fuck in a bed
Sext: Bring me pancakes from the midnight breakfast gathering please
I think if I send him enough nudes, he will buy my plane ticket.
the twins are trying to figure out which one is the one doing body shots off a janitor in this picture
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