So I feel really bad about last night...can i give you a blow job and we call it even?
Today in class was pretty awsome. I dont feel like i have to throw up and im actually paying attention. This is a first for friday
hey quick question, what would you consider to be a "first date" porn?
Also, I'm sewing my entire Halloween costume by hand. I better get laid at every single party I go to.
I just had to ask my dad for money to pay for my birth control. I've hit financial rock bottom.
First off, get on bc solely in preperation for this event. Second, as my little sister you have a lot of whore to live up to.
As added birth control I warned him that if he knocked me up tonight I would name the baby Truck.
Dude. Yeah. This is a game changer. I feel dirty and possibly pregnant and it hasn't happened yet.
When I tried to give you a hickey, you karate chopped me in the neck.
there was 'chicken suit porn' in my search history.......also 'scuba diving porn'
He shattered his pelvis base jumping so his dicks out of commission for 4 months. Your up, second string.
She showed up ready for sex all night.. with waters and a meat and cheese tray
We have hung out 5 times and only had sex 3 of those times. I'd call that friendship
Drunk me left sober me a shower beer in expectation of Hurricane Harvey. Drunk me is the best.
in the past 2 days I've ruined2-3 lives, made 2 men quit the bar, started a Wednesdays only affair, ended it, ruined that engagement and had my tires slashed by a jealous bouncer. please stop letting me out....
Randomize
