He has that thing where they hang SUPER low
Ewww!! Elephantitis
Made out with me girlfriend while she was peeing. all time high, or all time low?
best googles of the semester: toe fucking, purpose of two nostrils, human tail. with pictures
NBC reported that a group almost has enough signatures to submit pole dancing as an Olympic sport in 2016...
God I fucking love America.
Just saw out breathalyzer tubes from last night on the side of the road. Glad the cop let us know that they are biodegradable
He sent me a picture of his dick with a cowboy hat on it.
It's my coworker's last day party and I'm the one who ended up shitfaced on the train with half a bottle of belvedere in my bag.
Dude cabbage spilt on the floor, and now danielles rolling it. Happy st party's day.
Sarah's knitting me a hat as an apology for unknowingly making out with my boyfriend
I love it when he cheats on me with nice people
Ramen still too hot to eat. Eating it anyway. Stoner girls feel no pain
He managed to crash an entire train of shopping carts into a wall. I think he noticed my implants.
I was giving him a handjob in the woods and a family walked by
Told him my main goal was to seduce the man and convince him to leave his wife for me. He didn't argue just asked me to let him know if I succeeded so he didn't waste anymore time not sleeping with the secretary at his office. I have an incredible boyfriend.
I kinda wanna drive through the Gator bar parking lot and seeing if my panties are on they ground, they should be right next to my pride...
I know we're not on great terms here, but I need to know if you're still available for sexual activity...cause if not I need to get going on a work-out plan.
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