There's a dildo in the cheerios box here...
so now she's a stripper
can't say i'm surprised
he cried for an hour, then he threw up on my lap then started singing party in the usa...opera style...
Haha he acted like he's never seen a tampon catapolt across the hall before
At this point I just want to meet a man with a job.
I was short on money so I let my roommate mase me for $60
Ya I know. She's self aware though, like the terminator. Which is the best kind of crazy
Hows the party lookin?
At a live sex show right now. Not sure about the employee party
Beer, water, beer, water, beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer so much beer
There's no way you didn't at least start out with a dick. I obviously know there isn't one now, but there is no way that you were born a girl
At the end of the night i was really thirsty and tied to a bedpost
I suggest both. Please have sex with them and prepare notes for a final comparison.
She was here for a threesome... She doesn't have to put the new roll of toilet paper on the dispenser. She can leave the new roll wherever she wants!
I had to put my dog down, accidentally outed my brother, and was given a fucking fish sandwich instead of a Big Mac ALL IN ONE DAY! Am I really the person you want to consult for advice? Hhhmmmmmm?
Why is there a condom in my ukulele?
Randomize