I was so drunk last night, I had to Wikipedia what i did.
I've decided to only have meaningless sex from now on.
And what brought this epiphany?
I've decided it's a lot easier to have dirty amazing sex with someone when you don't care about the other person or what they think of you. I'm going to test this theory soon. Will update you later
On this egg donor form, it asks "In the past 5 years, have you had sex for drugs or money?" It only gives a yes or no option and no place to explain myself. What do I do?
She's like Mona Lisa when she's intoxicated. No one understands her but they all think she's marvelous
Well i then put my mattress in my closet and am currently on it. This is a new one.
I found out what happened to that girls weave last night. It was draped over a bush in my backyard.
somehow, even strange, drunk, middle-aged men on the RTA can't understand why he'd choose her over me
maybe it's because you talk to strange, drunk, middle-aged men on the RTA
I'm sitting on the floor singing Bruno mars while they cook and occasionally pet me
If you fall asleep, my vagina and I will never forgive you.
I still can't believe I was army crawling thru his backyard at 2am..
how do I say, without sounding slutty... That I can take a dick?
Apparently I have a "problem" because I enjoy doing bong rips in the shower
Me and dad were just reflecting on that time he found a gas mask bong in the backyard.
Yep. Just fucked a 34 year old on the football field where we both went to high school. That's a story for the grandkids.
I’m not lawful evil! I do evil things because I want to, not because of the law
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