Sarah Palin just got hired for Fox News. Watch out Jersey Shore... there's a new drinking game in town
Dude they have ski ball. Anywhere that has skiball is bound to be bangin.
I only have two playlists on my iPod. One for when im getting drunk, one for when I'm getting high. Is this something to be worried about?
Just think, if your stepsister would've gotten knocked up 2 years earlier, she could've had a TV show. What a bitch.
Sorry my moustache came off because I was face first in a layered bucket full of jello shots.
I was naked with an australian flag taped to my boobs. Damn internationals think they can claim everything.
There was enough sluts here for 2 threesomes to happen at the same time, and you still struck out. What did you do to piss off karma so much?
The funny part was that the cop pulled us over cause the park was closed, not because I had just come up from giving the guy a blowjob when the cop drove by.
I asked him to tell me a bedtime story, then threw up on him.
you made cordon bleu at 4am and declared you were Marshall Stewart
After we hooked up he started to cry and called his mom and told her he wanted to marry me
I feel I should send an apology letter to my anesthesiologist.
Hypothetically speaking...if I was arrested in Wisconsin, say Kenosha county, would you post my bail all the way from Oregon? If yes, will you also accept my collect call in t-minus 13 hours?
I opened the bathroom door and the starting point gaurd was eating out my art history professor
Yeah totally passed out in their trash can last night.
Randomize
