That's why Kanye is a gay fish.
How am I a tease?
Dude you flashed me ur vagina and walked away.
ONLY PART OF IT.
She said "I only hook up with guys I'm dating"
So... What happend then?
We dated for an hour, i broke up with her after. BOOM.
Just spent 3 hours on the Mcdonalds website. I don't know what to do with myself now that college is over.
i love being in ibiza. their hotels are much more receptive to walking around naked in the lobby than our american ones.
Just coerced a Santa to buy me a handle. Tis the season.
If you can't find your cat in the morning it's cause i put him in the laundry basket and then put the laundry basket in the shower.
You know Im horny if Im walking around in my lingerie and sex robe. It's my field of dreams mentality. If I wear it, he will come.
getting up at 8am to start drinking seemed like a much better idea before I had to wake up at 8am
I'm just going to text him the word sex repeatedly until he comes over.
Did it work?
Duh, it only took 27 texts and 15 minutes and he was at my front door.
Hey, you remember years ago when you told me you would give me a kidney?
Ok I've processed it. Who the fuck makes out drunk in a parking lot in a backseat with the windows down in the middle of the day?!?!
I saw him and didn't have sex with him. Responsibility five!
Can someone explain to me why guys are so fascinated w their dicks that they feel like they'll die if they don't send unsolicited dick pics
Juice tastes so weird without alcohol
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