I was sitting behind this girl in class and she logged out of her facebook, hacked into her boyfriends, and then proceeded to check his inbox. This is why I'm single.
You were in the bathroom for two hours practicing "Revenge Faces".
i think i scared a bird with my dick
So if you ever need to know a guy who knows a guy who knows a guy that can put a 24oz beer can up his ass... Hit me up...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I mean really it's like when you're super hungry and you can't decide what to eat, you just know you want food. This is that situation, but for my vagina
I made $80 at the club last night by telling him he was like a wild pony and I just wanted to tame him
The cop told us he we helped him pass his monthly bong quota. He almost ran out of room on the hood of his car..
Omg I'm puking right now and then sneezed four times in a row. You don't know pain til this happens to you.
She apologized again the next day. I said it was pee under the bridge
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Its guy fieris flavor town of suffering™
Fun fact: the guy I banged last night. His middle name on his birth certificate is "Windstorm."
I cannot belive our party caught on fire
Im glad your laughing because im currently convincing my penis you didnt mean it and its all gunna be ok.
Thanks for fucking the skin off my dick
It was a joint effort between my vagina my feet and your hand you can't just blame that all on me
when you come over can you bring tequila and my birth control? Thanks girl!
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