So she said she wears a diaper when she's on her period and I'm not going to lie, I kind of want to see the diaper.
thanks for not screaming that I'm pregnant when that guy was giving me his number.
Fell asleep in bio again. Sometimes i feel like college is just one really expensive nap.
I no longer question where these bruises come from... between the strip pole in the living room, the slipnslide in the hallway and our constant level of intoxication I will always be bruised...
i told them to call me paula dean as i was making all 10 for $10 boxes of pizza rolls in the microwave
Yes I have a handle on life. A handle of Svedka.
All I want is for every tall lanky young guy who is reading in a Starbucks to go balls deep in me. That's all.
Besides the flaccid incident, it was decent. Average sized. So this is my life now. Loneliness and lackluster sex.
He told me he wanted a penis beard so that he could look at girls faces when they gave him blowjobs. i have to say, i kind of admire his creativity
Hello. You don't know me, but word on the street is that we are now eskimo sisters. I feel like we should go out for coffee and compare experiences.
I heard you shushing me, but my screaming orgasm drowned it out.
Some male strippers are here, I threw pancakes at them. It's ok
Slept at my ex's best friends house while my ex was locked out and I walked by him sleeping in his car this am
The batteries in my vibrator died before I could finish. Which is a lot like my sex life lately......
Well I'm trying out this whole "not sleep with a stranger thing"
That's silly... just silly. And by silly I mean unrealistic.
Randomize
