i'm three days dirty after drinking 14 hours last night and some other questionable behavior (hula hooping at a large concert, for example) i will just always bring the class. and the sluttiness.
umm..so Dad's wearing a thong, I don't know what to do
put a dollar in it?
You covered in salsa con queso would take care of all of my cravings right now
he keeps commenting everything on my facebook. it's like he's virtually peeing on me
i was getting a blow-job tonight in the mens bathroom of a bar and the bouncer comes in and says "bro i don't mean to cock block but you cant do that here."
Come over, I want to eat cookie dough off your dick.
I once puked on the side of the hwy driving home and it somehow made me feel more Canadian. So don't rule it out
i feel like there is just so much pressure to sex him up, its like the weight of the world is on my vagina.
There is blood on my sheets, we apparently used 8 towels, everything in my shower is knocked down. Wut?
If I ever see that bitch it is going down flavor of love style
Dudes don't just lick butts of chicks they're not into.
Now I'm having a post-sex brownie. Is this the life? I think it might be
Teach me the ways of your demonic sorcery.
I just had sex with the Sheriff's Deputy. You should call me.
*6am blends another margarita* *615am blends straight tequila*
Randomize
