she was so hung over that i had to hold her hair while she puked in a trash can in the middle of the student center as new freshman and their parents walked by.
First date: that requires underwear, huh?
In the middle of pouring my wine you asked me if I could hear your vibrator from my room.
Just ran four miles to popeye's. And back. Dedication.
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he is allergic to cats. we can only glue dog hair on him. otherwise he might die and i dont want to be responsible for that.
ahaha ok
let's call it "werewolfing"
I actually have to watch Breaking Bad to make me feel better about my choices last night.
Romantically speaking, I want to sit on his face.
When you get home...find me in the shower. Only safe place at the moment.
Sounds good. Look at us. Planning sex like proper adults.
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Side note: I just realized that I can make my hand warmers double as a heated push up bra.
But what I'm actually thinking about is how everyone except me had sex on my bed this weekend and now I'm just sleeping in it with a 7 foot tall blue panda
So, anyways, aside from wanting to seduce my roommate for booze, how's everything been
He was licking my ear while recommending that I shop at IKEA. I think he's my perfect guy.
And, by “make you dinner” I mean “have lots of sex and multiple orgasms.” So you should probably eat something and before you come over
And hydrate too
Anything special planned for Valentines Day?
Does testing the strength of my coworker’s marriage count?
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