we were holding hands throwing up into the same garbage can; if thats not true love i dont know what is .
Just ran into my ex in the WOMENS bathroom. He said I did this to him. Swore he never wore my clothes but said he liked my skirt. I need vodka.
he said that he wanted to outsmoke the rain, I don't know what that means but I'm gonna go help him
He's got a southern drawl and a lisp. I'm getting mindfucked right now.
I'm the saddest girl in a tutu right now.
I've lost all respect for marriage since I joined this bachelor party.
Its completely acceptable to go naked under my graduation gown right?
Some ppl might frown upon it but theyre prudes
I will refer to it as the penis of glory... he fucked me for 3 and a half hours - and all he needed was a 5 minute power nap in the middle (which he took WHILE INSIDE ME). I plan on staying with him forever
After 7 months of nothing.. shall we throw your vagina a party? as its reinstatement into society?
Get my husband this drunk again I will rip off your balls off with my bare hands and then cut them up with a dirty axe like fish bits. Do you understand me? DO YOU UNDERSTAND ME?! See you at breakfast, FUCK FACE. I'll shove that bottle of Jamison so far up your ass you'll still be praying in 2020 you can take a shit! Seriously, you make it hard to be your best friend.
if a girl cums in a dorm room and no one hears it did it really happen?
My vagina has made plenty life decisions and I would like to point out very few if not any of them were in my favor.
Babe, holding my hair while i blow you doesn't count as being romantic
He just blew a .079. Jesus loves him THAT much.
i just wanted have a romantic star gaze moment with him. untill he let out a massive fart.
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