...., I just tried brushing my hair wothh a toothbrushg. fail
ps not my toothbrush awkward.
i think you shook his penis after he was done peeing.
your suggestions for charades were, getting sucked into an aircraft turbine, getting raped by a dolphin, and having sex with a vacuum cleaner. you got your own, and actually used a vacuum cleaner as a prop.
If you dont, I will tell Dad you are gay.
Fine, and I will tell him you fucked his business partner
Previous statement retracted.
This titty bar has wifi. I just did FaceTime stage side
you blew your rape whistle in his face every time he got near a girl till he left the party...
how you manage to cockblock me from 500 miles away still baffles me.
Please don't drown this weekend. It would be a shame to lose a dick like yours.
somedays, I wish the drugs you give me would convince me they were a bad idea preingestion.
where's the fun in that?
Apparently he proposed after he saw me chug vodka out of a traffic cone.
I'm pretty sure I just discovered what the American Dream is said the person eating a hotdog for breakfast in bed in her underwear
Im coming down to miami this weekend
We shall drink from the everclear river
I think vodka/water/skittles totally beats your crystal light mimosas
Did you come home, throw out a ton of shoes, then leave again?
That is exactly what I did.
you have 10 seconds to explain why the toilet is full of bread or its ALL GOING ON YOUR BED.
Randomize
