The more I throw up, the more I am remembering exactly what I drank last night...in order.
Today in psych we learned that you are a whore.
Me specifically?
Yep.
The last thing I remember is you asking me how to grow french fries.
She's the only person who can pull off turning an outdoor patio heater tower into a stripper pole.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Thanks for having 911 ready when I jumped off the balcony
We got kicked out after you decided to chase your shot using the soda gun behind the bar.
There are very few times i will succumb to laying naked on my bathroom floor. But lastnight is a resonable enough cause.
Accidentally hit on the same girl twice at the bar, she give me her number both times though so I think its cool.
Why aren't you two playing Dora the explorer with each other's genitals yet?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Probably gonna run and pray I throw up. Then go get a coffee/bagel & continue to rally
Currently at a bar observing the mating patterns of drunken people in their 60s. This is hilariously terrifying. Hope he has Viagra.
It looks like I jerked off a rainbow.
I'm a grown ass woman. Treat me like one. Fuckboy
I had mediocre parking lot sex last night so the night wasn't a complete bust.
I have finally found someone I enjoy for reasons that do not necessarily include his dick
Randomize