i wish swine flu would become a total pandemic so we cld be rid of all the people that are complaining about it
like why cant he just admit that he still wants to fuck me even though im underage
why did your cousin post "out tonight" on facebook? doesn't he know it's only 1 in the afternoon?
shhh don't tell him. it's cloudy out and none of his clocks work
It's offcial there's a Bobby Light radio station on pandora.
just saw 2 fat kids fight for the last slice of pizza. Litteraly fight. God Bless America
It's just one of those nights that , as long as you have the drugs, everything is going to be alright.
Actually, you don't want to see me.. reached an all time low drinking kahlua out of the bottle concealed in a macdonalds bag
Actually it's really just going to be me drunk in your living room swinging from a pole on a tuesday morning.
is it too much for me to say that i have a ziplock bag with ice in it in my underwear?
At what part of the night did you guys leave?
After my hot tub cannonball.
I couldn't think of the word "bath" so instead I told him I was marinating in soapy water
Do you know how many guys' fantasies I've been told I'm a part of lately?!
Just 2. But still.
Also what’s the official rule on washing one guy’s jizz off my back before I go out with another guy? That I should?
I should have known when she said it would be "fun" we'd end up in the hospital
ugffhh I have work in 4 hours and have recieved zero sleep, seeing that I'm trapped in the arms of a snoring bear man. can't. breathe. lost in the forestry of his chest hair.
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