you were going around the whole club telling people to smell ur purse
That can be our thanksgiving, vodka and cornbread. Just like the pilgrims.
Pre-St Patricks Day Log: Threw up across a 14ft radius, this is why the irish dont drink tequila
Chicken wings don't come back up an through your nose as easily as you'd think
I haven't gotten it in awhile but since spring break is next week I'm willing to have a pregnancy scare if it means no bleeding through the suit
Yeah wouldn't want it to interfere with beach sex. Nothing should interfere with beach sex
So last night I taught an old homeless dude to respond to "Blue" so I could shout your my boy Blue at the party
Currently studying Econ, while waiting outside current booty call's residence for him to return from the strip club. This is your fault.
Laying in bed nude eating a Big Mac with a cat. It's gonna be a good year.
FOUND: my underwear in the cabinet above the toilet. What the actual fuck.
your life is not complete until you watch a gaggle of murderous clowns dance to gangnam style.
also, what is the correct term for a shit ton of clowns?
btw my frat has a search out for you. the "girl who threw up in the middle of the party" but it was on some fat girls. so thank you.
This has to be the weirdest conversation I've ever had sober and in the middle of the day before.
I woke up naked in her room. More precisely, I woke up naked in her room with her and her sister laughing at my penis. I hate my life.
Of two things I'm absolutely sure: 1. I only took 2 hits off that joint and 2. I definitely ran over hedwig on the way home
Well I'm trying out this whole "not sleep with a stranger thing"
That's silly... just silly. And by silly I mean unrealistic.
Randomize
