I drank it, and now my boss keeps hitting me in the face with beams of light.
Tripping at your desk probably isn't the best plan you've had.
i'm pretty sure the devil's penis is california-shaped
Let's discuss options later this evening. I'll draw out said options and compare and contrast the "accessibility" of the costume for quickies. Because you never know. Halloween is full of surprises. I'll also compare practicality, level of skank, and creative features.
well, obviously he didn't fuck me for my strong moral fiber.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Last I remember we played rock paper scissors for who would fuck the guy with cowboy boots on and I won..
You were so drunk last night you left the bar to go buy a razor so you could go home with him
Ugh he's so pretty though. He bit my face at the bar because I tried to steal his ID and I forgave him
This guy smelled his armpits before trying to approach me at the bar
Regardless of your intentions, deep throating a Twinkie is NOT sexy. You owe that poor cashier an apology the next time you pump gas.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
In my opinion the party was fun, but i did A LOT of cocaine so my view was a little distorted......
If you can't drink with the big boys, give up your beer and go back to the playpen
IM AT A ROOFTOP FUNDRAISER LOOKING OVER THE WHITE HOUSE I WILL NOT RUIN MYSELF
My Dicks been hard all day. Poor guy isn't used to vacation being over
I complemented his smile, he sends me a dick pic. Seriously?
Well, fuck this election. I'm getting drunk, regardless of who wins.
Randomize