I bet Jafar would keep his hat on during
I don't know which is more embarrassing, the fact that I shat on the floor today or that I told you about it.
Instead of having sex, we spent the entire night making pillow forts and have sword fights. I think I'm in love
You know you're wathing too much reality TV when you start adding commentary to every day life.
life just isnt the same w/o real world cancun
Take this only to mean that we love you, but we're having a serious, half-hour, hypothetical discussion about how far we think we could throw you.
Is there a reason why the cops knew her name as they were chasing her?
All together there was 318 cigarette butts in the pool... And my microwave.
I vaguely recall putting a toaster in the freezer.
The porch is breathing.
STAY OUT OF MY SHROOMS YOU CUNT
I just called my boyfriend "Dad"... Awkward
2014 decided to stick it to me one last time. Right up the ass.
Tinder in Coventry is like browsing a gallery of mugshots from Azkaban
I wonder how drunk we can get before Christmas Caroling turns into trespassing.
I just texted my mom from a strip club.
Randomize
