If you want to dance with a less than stellar Asian chick, I have just the girl for you.
He felt like a one man threesome
She was singing my heart will go on into her barf bag. celine aint got shit on her.
Apparently I climbed into a dryer last night and refused to leave... There are pictures to prove it
Stay Away From These 29 Online Dating Red Flags
My uncrustable is thawing in my straightener
its warm now so i can go back to sleeping with guys based on their fuckability rather than how much warmth they generate.
So I fucked her. If you're keeping score at home, it's all tied up with horrible sex with someone I like and great sex with someone I hate both with 1.
I've decided he is effectively a mouth, hands and cock held together by bad ideas and compliments, and I'm OK with that.
Relationships are fuckin' work. And you can't just up and leave with no questions when you really just need to get home because you're about to shit your pants.
You're so wise.
21 Rideshare Drivers Had to Drive These NSFW Passengers
I'm high. Everything has a 45° angle. That is as far as my eyes open
Nothing brings compassion from a group of cafe workers like walking in and asking if they have a 'hangover special'
I suppose we should both be prepared for the secret service to come visit us after this conversation. Hi NSA.
I haven't even had my coffee yet and you're being slutastic
All I'm sayin is that I don't want to raise anything. Or deal with anything. Or having anything come out of my vagina. I mean, I don't think that's asking too much.
Didn't pick classes because we were out all weekend...only open course is "alcohol and drug problems". Fucking ironic.