i wish my penis had a tongue
So on facebook, the pictures from my church mission trip are right up next to the pictures of my first time on E. Sorry Jesus.
im sober playing flip cup. its like cheating.
they named it eva bongoria. i had to hit it based on the name alone.
please don't text me until you can spell three letter words again.
She threw up in the hot tub how's your night
You'd be surprised at how many crooked penises are out there
private study room at the lib turned into byob study room. that turned into battle royale and eric impaling his leg on a pen.
Just left the frat house in last nights clothes minus my earings, shoes, underware, tequilla cap, and my dignity. If you see me on your way home just hit me
do you know how much drugs we can buy now that you got that raise at work
It's a pretty amazing thing to watch... He used "Rad tits" as his pick up line of the night. And it worked... 3 times
It felt as i were a pad of butter melting onto a piece of toast.
there's a photo set of like seven dicks covered in glitter....i don't know what to do
I am not a slut. I'm just very open with how much I love to have sex. Stop judging.
He made me watch a sex tape him and his gf made. They were in the shower when her roommate walked in on them. Not kidding: she asked to join in.
I hate him. He gets laid, my dick gets laughed at.