don't worry, i have a range rover and a brother hopped up on steroids.. we can solve this little misunderstanding quite easily.
i find it depressing how it takes me longer to find a good video compared to the actual jacking off process.
The crowing achievement of my life is still the time I made a 3 course meal out of things I found in the dumpster.
My warmest regards to the fish in that koi pond I puked in.
right before he passed out he said "take care of your tender spirit"
Codeine + Boredom = Sprinting between my front and back door.
He and I are basically the same person, except he has a glorious penis and I have glorious breasts.
I slept with someone shorter than me. My vagina weeps.
You fool.
I have to stop letting him stay all weekend. I feel like a cored apple.
Is she okay?
She may want to issue revenge punches, but medically fine.
I may quit my job to go be a costumed Jedi at Disneyland.
How do you get kicked out of 3 different Subways in one night..
Not very gracefully, that's how.
Fuck you, dude, I'm not sharing my weed anymore if you're going for the Panthers.
He let me eat chexmix while we fucked... I think I love him.
Did you make it home alright?
No I'm sitting under a tree by a cricket. He's alone crying out for someone to Fuck him. This guy gets me.
Randomize
