i wish i could post a picture of his odd shaped penis on facebook and label it "wtf???"
NEVER shave your cleavage hair.
I put cups full of chips next to every bed, couch, and toilet so that everyone could have a snack when they woke up....
still doesn't change the fact you were dunking your sock in the toilet.
i hate this class. from the way they're all staring you would think they've never seen a girl in basketball shorts, heels and sunglasses.
Haha im Trying. This detox stuff tastes nasty. It's bad when the only thing that came to mind when i took the first sip was how good it would be with Vodka
Even tho I saw his penis. He is still a really nice guy.
Do you ever wonder how many people have prayed for you to be a better person?
turkey basters and jungle juice, is that really the whole shopping list for new year's?
Yeah just got a blowjob at busch stadium during the cardinals game childhood dream realized
she texted me out of nowhere. and I wanted to get drunk. like I didn't even have her new number until 6 hours ago and bam we were rolling around drinking cotton candy vodka from the bottle she had stuffed in a boot
Sometimes I feel like I should become a beautician purely for my ability to shave pretty shapes into my pubic hair.
I'm going to have to have a long talk with god if my soul mate has a prince albert
This lady gave me four cups to go along with my gallon of daiquiri. Silly girl, all I need is a straw.
Woke up to your boyfriend in my bed last night. What's that about?
Randomize
