i can't wait to go to hell
yeah...all of my friends will be there for sure
Id pretty much put it in anything at this point. Jello. Dogs. 12 year old boys
you were licking his little sister's watercolors and trying to paint with your tongue.
I got into my dads silver toyota in the back seat to get picked up and 2 mins later I asked my dad when are we leaving, then an old mexican woman turned around. wrong toyota I'm guessing.
someone needs to make a hangover cure that isn't cocaine.
I don't appreciate the fact that you tagged me as a giant bucket Miracle Whip.
Last I saw him was around 10 this morning. He was passed out on the porch with his head under the barbeque cover and there were cups of orange juice around him as well as loose tobacco spread everywhere. Good luck getting a hold of him.
i was staring at her drunk thinking "shes at least a four"
She is just sitting by the bathroom like a little puppy waiting for a knight in shining armor to take her in there to fuck her. New low?
I tried snowmobiling at 2 am. I broke my glasses. You're right. Things do get out of control.
Um ... did I have a lizard on my shoulder last night at the bar?
I just almost caught my floor on fire, then decided I could put it out with my knuckles! So I'm doing good!
This is why you are going on a date. To see if he is fun or if we need to shank him in the parking lot.
THERES A FUCKBOY IN MY PERSONAL SPACE
GET IT AWAY FROM ME IM ALLERGIC
It started with drunk jenga and ended with me simultaneously peeing and puking on his feet in the tub while he held me up. I met Tequila. I don't like her.
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