You tried to wear your Jesus costume into Family Christian stores and say it was a book signing.
is wine microwaveable?
Apparently Sundays are the worst days for your friends to get their head split open and need stitches...there's only 1 doctor on duty
It's a good deal. He teaches me how to longboard, then we have sex
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Its ok we found him,,, He is in the bathroom trying to write his life story on a roll of toilet paper.
I am assuming I was his dirty Mardi Gras mistake and I can live with that
He asked me when I was coming to bed while simultaneously drilling a fart into the mattress. Don't fucking get married.
We knew it was a good time to leave when you spilt the salsa on the ground and were trying to put it back in the jar with your hands
Moments after comforting her about her boyfriend issues I found myself in the other room showing him my tits.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My roommate has gone Christmas crazy. It looks like Jack Frost came all over my living room. Wanna come fuck me in the fake snow by the fireplace?
What is soo wrong about a house of half-naked people hugging each other and laughing?
The pinata full of drugs?
You cant use biscuit as a chaser
you don't even have a vagina so you don't get to tell me what to put in mine
And for today's main disappontment. I thought I saw a midget with fireworks get on the buss, alas it's a child with cleaning supplies
Well... Chad blew off half of his hand last night. We were able to find most of it.
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