She made me repeat after her: "I take responsibility for what I put in my own mouth."
Today a TA in one of my classes told me he thought I was 35 and going back to school as an adult learner. Alcohol is working me.
Watching Argentina vs Germany during a wedding on an iPhone. Thank you Steve Jobs.
Apparently as I was doing the walk of shame home my dad's date was on her way to hers. hoes come in all ages these days
i didn't realize we were even dating until i ran out of weed
Dude she has starbursts in her sports bra. I feel like this is counter productive.
I loved your drunken rendition of "I wanna dance with somebody" that you left on my voicemail last night.
and then you started talkingabout how you wish birth control was disspensed as a candy necklace
Also while I am being the bigger person I plan on bringing over something strong smelling and/or alcoholic to torture the poor hungover bastard
Once you've seen a girl stick a snake in her snatch normal stuff seems like Barney and friends
I did sing regulators with a random black dude at The Rail without looking at the screen, hugged him and walked off stage. I pretty much live up to all expectations.
Can we pretty pretty please go to Mardi Gras tomorrow? I promise I'll be a good girl and not puke in a pledges car
best eviction party ever.
it wasn't an eviction party you asshole, you just happened to get yourself evicted during the party.
He told me that if he broke my bed my bed durring sex he would take me to ikea, but only on Monday because it's all you can eat meatballs. I think I'm in love.
He fell asleep during FOREPLAY. Sober!!!
Im outta here as soon as my phone charges wtf