so my bro's bff came over...we had an awkward "yeah we fucked and can fuck later, but let's just pretend it didn't happen in front of the family" hug.
and the mascot is a pinecone. its really no surprise that people here dont get laid
I wish I could get plan B off e-bay so it would be a secret and cheap.
2 bagels in my tummy and my herpes on my mind
They have a pepper shaker for pot.
I mean, I'm not looking for prince charming. I'm looking for the glass slipper of dicks.
He calls it "his noble steed" and i plan to ride it.
You're making her cookies in enchange for knitting lessons. You will die a virgin.
Good point, clearly my love of penis contributed to my torn knee ligament.
Well, when he's back from China he's probably gonna be pissed I used the spare key he gave me to prove to everyone I'm fucking an NBA player. We took all his booze too.
it went ok. then he slept in a parking lot and took me out for a picnic the next day. boys are confusing.
I heard that clinking noise from behind me and I already knew you were whipping out a Smirnoff in class. Again.
I'm making a quesadilla and including it in the picture because that's the only way I think I can send her dick pics.
Thought for a game. Duck, Duck, Grey Goose. If you're tapped, you take a shot. Then proceed as normal.
It's weird having sex with someone you actually like
Randomize
