Worst part was I had to fart super bad and didn't want to ruin the room so I farted in a pillow and threw it under the bed.
I called him Han Solo during sex, he looked at me like he was mortified then I realized he came.
My mother just asked me if i ever swallow the goods...should i be concerned?
We've been fucking since Friday.... This is the most committed non-committed relationship I've ever been in
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
New drinking game: take a shot everytime Jay-Z is played during the NFL draft.
Ok. Cause im very serious about this. I wanna strip and do coke for a month
Oh and you pulled your pants down outside in front of like five people, held my hand, then peed.
Just found my bra in a bag of chips on the kayak floating about the pond. Sure sign of a good night
He is just lying there. People are throwing money onto his chest as they walk by...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
As its breast cancer awareness month, I'm going to do my part by making everyone aware of my breasts
Hooked up with a guy resembling a bearded Cher. I need the lenses on my beer goggles fixed. Pronto.
My sister just showed me a snap chat that I don't remember sending, it was a picture of me with two big macs in my bra with just the words "BURGER TITS"
When dealing with embarassing medical issues, don't you want your brother's wife to be the one fishing around up your ass?
We walked around last night for hours saying nothing but nom nom nom and barking at each other.
I ripped ass in on and around her face during a hard 69. I don't think she'll ever call me again.
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