I really don't want to move...I'm having a motivation problem.
kev is about to show us pictures of the tranny he accidentally fucked last night.
I'll be there in 10
mom and dad sent me an easter basket full of beer pong supplies again.
Just gave advice in krystal burger while holding and pointing with a corona to a 3 year old, told her to enjoy her stroller time while it lasts. The mom pushed her away fast.
he somehow instantly knew i was from vermont.
it probably had something to do with chasing your soco with maply syrup.
i feel sorry that you can never enjoy the feeling of shaved balls
What's the politically correct way of saying you've made someone your bitch?
We've reached the point in our fuck buddy relationship where we are playing words with friends. This is too intimate.
Used my phone to vibrate 'eye of the tiger'. It's like Rocky is punching my nuts, but gently.
I think my Halloween costume this year will be made entirely of pillows and I'll be Marshmellow girl or Kirby. That way I'm comfortable, warm, and if I fall over drunk I'm safe.
FYI your bra is now hanging in the hallway as a trophy.
Could we try to replay the decision making process whereby only you and I bought and drank a keg this weekend? Because there were some fundamental flaws!
How did you end up breaking into that laundromat at 3am? I saw the snapchat but like..... How?
We just had sex on an abandoned logging road while wearing snow shoes. God bless Montana boys.
I someohow managed to lose my butt plug in tne midst of moving to B.C. and I am not a happy camper.
You walked around in your costume going up to every guy saying "I'm a squirrel, give me your nuts"
Randomize
