why doesnt he love me? i have tried everything. i even sang to him after sex.
you have got to be kidding?
What do you say about some mid-afternoon anal?
it always starts out as a suggestion then three hours later I have cum in my eye.
I just looked at my iPhone gps history... "the gas station", "the park with a big scary fence", "the trampoline", and, my favorite, "where we were when we were about to do lines off a bible".
I apologize for forcing you to look at my boob when we were high. It was uncalled for
The lid of our salsa is promoting a contest that ended in July '09
I don't think going to Relay for Life and painting our faces while everyone stares at us is a sufficent late night after the bars.
I don't know if trying Molly for the first time before my flight was an awesome or aweful idea
Is there some sort of line being crossed when your shower activities start to involve jimmy johns?
I like to oil my gears with cheap vodka and strangers
And I woke up by myself with peanut butter.. Cool
Do NOT approach him. He has sex with everything. LITERALLY everything, and I DO mean everything. He's so horny we once caught him with his dick in a pumpkin. A legitimate honest to God pumpkin that he bored a hole in
I'd have to have a ring. Like I don't want to be called "the ex girlfriend that shit on me"
just saw two eagle scouts making out in chic-fil-a
He calculated like a serious conversion in his head the other day and got a crazy number and I was like damn that’s hot please proceed to take your clothes off.
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