There is no way he is gay with that hair.
flash back: i gave smirnoff to a group of children at walmart
you kept lifting my skirt up, yelling "PANTY PARTY". needless to say, you're at the top of my father's shit list right now.
The album was titled "Best Night Ever" until she found out she was preggers and switched it to "God Punishes Sluts"
you were smoking 3 cigarettes at once saying 'cancer isn't real! Its all in your head!'
she uses eco-friendly sex toys. she is the literal definition of a hippie.
malibu coconut giveth, and malibu coconut taketh away
he was spitting whole peanuts projectile out of his mouth at the waitresses as they walked by and then yelled across the restaurant that he had "no problem kicking any of their asses"
I'm in the city buying alcohol. I just got warned by a homeless man on the street that I shouldn't look so pretty "in these parts"
What people don't tell you about near death experiences is they give you a full on chub
T minus 20 hours until we forget our names, find some city cowboys, and g&t into the night.
I don't remember how I broke my nose last night, but I woke up with dried blood everywhere. Also, you should tell that guy how you feel.
I stopped hooking up with him and ran to the bathroom to throw up. He saw me throwing up and it made him throw up
It’s just hard to believe you really care about me when u haven’t touched my dick in 2 months
Best part though was when he wanted to cuddle and I was like, I'm going to go.
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