i love how you can even make your typing come across bitchy
So this girl in my math class just went to the bathroom, tampon in hand, comes back with it still in her hand starts digging around in her purse, takes her thing of birthcontrol out, goes oh fuck, and downs the rest of the pills. Got to love college.
You'd think after all these years of evolution that it would be longer than a golf pencil.
its taking every last moral i have not to steal this bike
you still have morals?
Well actually itd just be too hard to ride the bike with this large rake i just stole
just asked if they'd gift wrap go-go taquitos for you at 7-eleven
Or they can chase TEQUILA shots with it. I don't know why my phone capitalizes TEQUILA.
I want to meet new people and vomit on their things instead\n
Just start grabbing cocks. It can't go wrong! Just say you thought you knew him and wanted to check.
I'm just glad you're the only person I can have a "remember when we thought I was pregnant" conversation with.
Left and drinking by a bar by myself. Everyone is in pajamas. I'm in a tuxedo. This is my life.
Jesus Christ that hit just spoke to so many levels of my soul. It's caressing them softly
Less than a month to go... I do not understand how I was able to put up with a roommate who wears bright green Crocs for a year.
I just have to point out that once I typed "fa" my phone filled in "fatass"
I've been rehabbing my soul with cheese and wine lately
Still can’t get over the fact that we ate beef jerky off a strip club floor
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