Do you remember peeing on the wall and then yelling at us to stop looking at your dick?
her teeth should be alot whiter from all of those blowjobs she gives
Her father's a cardiologist, her mom's a lawyer...she just went from a 5 to a 10 real quick.
he wrote me a grocery list while i was passed out. every other item was gin. it went on for 4 pages.
Hey, hey, hey, hey. This is a hurriCAN.
the boys love us. they call us "the stoner girl suite down the hall". not very inspired, but flattering nonetheless
We found her. She's owling on the sink in the bathroom.
This bowl of cereal would be the size of a giant's bowl-piece. It's. that. big.
How much did you smoke??
As far as drugs go, alcohol has all the elegance and precision of hitting yourself in the head with a hammer.
Too many penises have met your hands. Stop or die.
FIND ME A DICK TO RIDE THAT HOPEFULLY IS ATTACHED TO A CUTE PERSON AND NICE PERSONALITY
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED. Is it okay if I only get 2 out of 3?
The D is nonnegotable.
Only thig bad about that muscular chick from the gym is she liked it so rough I had to bust out a few wrestling moves from highschool
Found out my grandpa had two wives and found out I'm eligible for some internships 11/10 would do acid again.
I apparently asked the cab driver to show us his dick and then he showed me a picture of his girlfriend
I'm good. Got my nipples pierced and threw my back out. 🙌
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